Fake Plastic Noodles

The first of the last.

Current mood: tired

So why is it then that when someone starts one of these dammed things, he or she probably has every intention of continuing to post, but plausibly will never do so? (except maybe Chris who actually has witty things to ponder. He is an analytical blogger – see below). I hardly think anyone cares that much about what I have to say as I do, and chances are if you do, I have already talked to you in person.

So why is it then that I am writing knowing full well that I will probably write two days from now and then maybe a week later and then 2 weeks, and then never?

It is because I am still holding out the hope that I, by some chance, will eventually have something to say. I have only started one blog before and I didn’t tell anyone about because I wasn’t sure what I wanted it to be about, but therein lies the central question of the blog: What type of blogger are you?

There are 5 types of bloggers.

1. The high school blogger: This person (usually a girl) types down EVERY feeling that she has in her adolescent mind. Most popular topics include: her best friend that’s being a total bitch, her boyfriend and how he’s her everything and they’ll be together 4ever, or her lack of boyfriend and why she’s worried she will be alone forever and ever at 17. The background is usually obnoxiously bright and cheery. It often has a small picture from prom or homecoming tiled all over that makes reading the text a real chore. She is currently listening to Simple Plan.

2. The band blogger: This blogger is usually male, mid-20s. He brags about each show he’s going to and a short history of why they’re so cool. The more obscure the band, the better. Actually, he knows you’ve never heard of said band and wants to make sure you feel bad about it. The background is very simple, but has been painstakingly crafted with HTML and/or CSS, like when a woman applies makeup to look like she isn’t wearing any. He is currently listening to a band out of Portland that has had 3 gigs and one record taped in the keyboardist’s basement (they’re too cool for even an indie label).

3. The mundane blogger: This blogger includes a large spectrum of people. These bloggers can be male or female Gen Y-ers. They write short entries about what’s going on in their lives; the job, the friends, the outings. There’s really nothing to exciting to report, but they feel the need to post anyway. The background is at default status. He or she is currently listening to Coldplay.

4. The analytical blogger: This blogger writes about one subject at length. He or she knows it can be very difficult to keep an audience, but if done well it can capture the head as well as the heart. He or she may be quiet in social situations, but has a lot to say in the company of good friends. The other outlet is, of course, the blog. The background could be made with an editor, with HTML, or both. But if using an editor he or she is smart enough to delete the “This background made with MySpace editor” in the code. He or she is currently listening to David Bowie.

5. The spinner/government blogger: These are actually not people, they are robots that eat old people’s medicine for fuel. The background is red, white, and blue. He or she is currently listening to the devil.

I think this entry would probably fit under the analytical category.

Currently listening : Elephant By The White Stripes Release date: 01 April, 2003